The TRUMP International Hotel & Tower, Chicago is not for broke asses. This place is expensive, very expensive. I have been to a few 5 star hotels but I still got a bit of sticker shock here at TRUMP. BUT the service is beyond any I have experienced anywhere – truly. So this what 5 Star service and amenities are all about. And the amenities are awesome…
I was gonna entitle this blog: You don’t have to be a high roller to rock the Trump, but after checking the pricing on some of the restaurant meals, rooms & spa services, I must say you have to strategize to not spend a fortune here. This place is for the rich – and for the occasional diva who will spoil herself every once and awhile. BUT you will NEVER think it is not worth the price – save for maybe the $21 hot dogs… Spending a couple of days here is a destination. Order the 90 minute classic trump massage. And tell your therapist how you like it done. Try out the Deluge Shower Experience with chromatherapy.
Chromotherapy shower: Huge slated tile room /shower with nine square shaped shower heads embedded at various heights into the wall.Each one can be adjusted for your height and pressure preferences. See computer panel with programming options: colored lights that illuminate from shower heads in the ceiling. DISCO SHOWER; music, water temperature etc.
Then go for a relaxing dip in the pool – if you can find it.
Finding one’s way to the pool was an adventure and the sweet front desk girl (or attaché as they say in Trumpville) kept apologizing for the inconvenience. “We’re working out the bugs and we are trying to figure out better signage.”
“Dah-ling it’s okay” I will find it…
Hmmm… not this way…
I have an idea for a sign: ASK SOMEBODY TO WALK YOU TO THE POOL ATLEAST TWICE THEN YOU WILL FIGURE IT OUT.
Nice hall, nice plant.
So, as I make my way around corners, down corridors and into dead ends I was reminded of the scene in Spinal Tap when the band IS TRYING TO FIND ITS WAY TO THE STAGE DOOR at a concert hall and gets lost in a maze of passages in the basement. You can get lost in this maze, but you sho ain’t in the basement.
Finally!
The pool is absolutely dreamy. The pool fucking rocks! I feel like I’m in some “MTV Cribs” show.
You must go steam and sauna before you go to your room. By the way, disco shower, steam & dry heat sauna are complimentary with your spa services.
I recommend staying in a Spa Room. Rooms are located on the Spa levels 14 and 14M. You have access to all of the spa amenities until 10PM and you can wander around on the spa floors in robe & slippers as you pop in & out of the pool, or one of the several “relaxation rooms” which have ambient lighting, new age music, beautiful furnishings. I never left the the 14th floor for two days.
Order short services (still about 20% higher than some luxe spas for signature services) so you can try as many as possible and won’t go to the po’ house.
Keep in mind that a couple of things are “Trump-ed” in pricing. Like the Mr. Trump dinner with a fine bottle of wine is on the dine in menu for $1000. Two Chicago hot dogs: $21… This place has a sense of humor. They have a wonderful in house dining menu ( I ordered room service the entire time as I did not wear anything but my trump robe for the entire THREE nights I was a resident) You can order Phad thai or a burger or a tray of freshly baked cookies or anything you want. I had my martinis brought to my room to order – delivered by a cutie named Erin who appeared at my door with one hand up (waiter style) holding a tray with one big assed cosmopolitan sitting dab smack in the middle and a huge smile on his face. “I love pampering you Miss Jordan…”
Watch out now! Don’t fuck with the cougar! They’ll be looking for Erin for weeks!
My room was fantastic.
The amenities were over the top: MP3 player thru a Bose sound system, 40 inch Flat TV, dvd player, Dvd library
rain shower, soaking tub with book stand,
and a fucking TV in the Bathroom mirror!! LOVED THAT!!
This room doesn’t stop: a towel oven for your aromatherapy neck and eye pillows, single serving coffee pods with Nespresso le cube machines, gourmet coffee & artesan teas,
gorgeous (yes, I said gorgeous) weight scale, yoga mat & block and even sexy free weights.
I don’t even know how to describe the bed. My BFF Barb came by and swore that she couldn’t get off the bed because it was so luscious and was holding her down in “its embrace”.
P.S. Wanna open or close the drapes? Just push the switch by the window and they will open/close electronically. Ooh la la – so decadent, so sexy!!
And then I got dressed and hopped in the elevator and went to Rebar – the in house lounge/bar. It has an almost panoramic view of the city and Chicago River. AND several staff members from the Green Dolphin Street are working there. Talk about feeling at home!! Talk about getting some love!!
Everything in Trump is about service, service, service and luxury. Everyone thanks you for asking them for anything. “It is my pleasure to connect you to the Spa” And I have yet to come across a a hint of snootiness. Everyone is just darling and fun and happy to help you or happy to have jobs… I never felt conned or sucked up to… I just felt loved like the diva I am.
Speaking of love, at this point I extended another day and at the suggestion of Sweet Carolyn (spa membership director) I schedule another two hour deep tisue massage with “a strapping six foot three inch” massage therapist from Poland named Daniel…. More tomorrow…
