“The Arthur Brothers” – That’s how my parents used to refer to arthritis. And they had it bad. My dad had osteoarthritis. His joints were deformed by it over the years… swollen knees, knobs on the elbow. He would sometimes complain but only in a joking manner: “Them Arthur brothers got me this morning” My father served in two wars – World War II and in Korea. What’s a little arthritic pain compared to taking a bullet on the battlefield and winning a purple heart?
I have no such heroics to boast or injury to balance my pain up against. My mother was not as stoic as my dad. She complained bitterly and with much drama about her aches & pains. I am my mother’s daughter! I have arthritis. I am an arthritic sufferer, I feel the pain, the agony. I see red colors when I view the aura of my knees. I am in hell, purgatory, woe is me. I can not fucking straighten my left knee! It just happened one day – yesterday. I woke up, I could not straighten my left knee. WTF???!!!
But seriously folks, this shit ain’t no joke. I remember as a child, hearing my parents and various older relatives complain about aches & pains. But they seemed so old and… OH SHIT!! They were about my age!! I’m old! Get that camera away from me!! Ha! I shoud have known it was a coming. My brother started complaning about arthritis a few years ago. He is fifty-five years old. Now it’s my turn to cry.
ME: I woke this morning and could not straighten my left knee.
BROTHER DAVE: (without hesitation) Sounds like Arthur got ya!
ME: ??? [to myself] well, duh…
Actually, I thought the pain existed cause I was fat. And I am working on that. I can lose weight, get in shape – again. SIGH, No problem. But I can not get any younger!!! What is this shit? I’m not old. I love hip hop!!
You know I hate to be one to complain all the time but walking with a limp like this is so not sexy. I lost 15LBS. I was gonna be cute this week. Now, I am hobbling around like some medieval street beggar. Cover me hands and limbs with filthy rags, give me a stick, I’ll beg for alms.
I don’t feel old. I feel better in mind & spirit today, than I did ten years ago. Oh, Hell, what am I talking about? Like I remember how I felt ten years ago!! Where did I put my purse? What was I talking about? Oh yeah – Arthritis. But I know I’m not alone. I was talking to a photographer friend and she was bitching about her aches and pains too and how running around with her God damned camera was hurting her hips, her knees, her feet… My BFF Elsiann says: “it gets worse…” My BFF Brenda has been battling surprise attacks of arthritis pains (at various parts of her body) for a couple years now. Oh Lord!!
I sound just like my mama when I get up out of a chair. After the sound of my popping, cracking knees, one is treated to my vespers as I call upon the Lord, the Goddess – anyone to get me out of a low chair!
It is widely known that exercise and stretching helps with the pain and strengthening of the muscles and tendons and such around these hell spots in my joints. I am seriously dedicating myself to working out. This is war!! Where’s my bottle of Glucosamine Chondroitin tablets? Anybody else feeling the pain of advancing age? Is this what “over the hill” means? Geez!
