I have to be honest wit you all. I have not been… uh… perfect in my goal towards diet and exercise. I have to confess that I fell off the wagon shortly after my proclamation to get it together. Actually, I jumped off the wagon and then found some C4 explosives and rigged the whole thing to blow… This is not going to be easy.
To be really honest, that particular struggle kinda got lost in the shuffle that is my life. I have been thinking about bills; my anxiety over the upcoming trip to the Baltics; my band and my lack of money. I hadn’t been to the movies in ages. It seemed an expense that could be delayed – there will always be movies playing and the ones I miss on the big screen can be seen on DVD and you know how I hate to sit with other humans in the theater and during the Holidays there are kids out of school – OY. No use fretting over it.
Then last week, I went to the movies on a whim. I was in the neighborhood, I had my Landmark Theater gift card in my wallet and there were twenty minutes till show time. And so I went for it. For a moment, I thought about not getting popcorn, but as soon as I bought the ticket I went into auto-pilot and droned over to the concession stand and ordered up my usual movie indulgence: large popcorn, extra butter, hot dog and a soda. OH, it pains me to even type it in the computer.
large popcorn, extra butter, hot dog and a coke.
I watched the young man as he took my order, half expecting him to raise an eyebrow, or step back and say:
Whoa! No wonder you’re so fat!
Of course he didn’t. He didn’t give a shit. He was on his own auto-pilot setting. I ran to the theater, which was empty by the way, and took my seat. I had my own private screening of The Young Victoria Well, almost private.
A hooded strange man with comical protruding teeth and having an ongoing conversation with beings unseen, joined me in the theater. He kept getting up and moving around, whispering and laughing – this was before the lights went down. It creeped me out. I looked up at the projection booth. It was all machinery and reflected light – not a sign of humanity up there. Will anyone hear me scream in here? Suddenly my private screening seemed like a recipe for disaster. I calmed down. The hooded bucktoothed crazy man finally left the theater and never returned.
I ate my hot dog and one quarter of my popcorn. The film ended (lovely movie by the way) I looked down at the mostly full bag of popcorn on the floor and thought to myself: This was a big waste of my gift card credit. All that butter and salt makes my belly sour, chaps my lips and costs a fortune – not to mention the fat and calories. What am I – a masochist? Never again! I have to get focused again on my body and health.
First Litmus test: movies was a failure – but not unproductive. I remembered to give a damn for next time. I can not give up. It is really hard this time. It seems that all of the bad habits that I restarted from the last time I lost weight have dug in a bit deeper this time. Oh shit!
P.S. Rupert Friend (who portrays Prince Albert in The Young Victoria) looks so much like Orlando Bloom that it makes me wonder why no one talks about it more. It always strikes me how much they look alike.
I too feel off the health wagon and it is only the second week of January. I have Loseit! on my Iphone and it is a pain but you enter EVERYTHING that passes your lips and I gotta say, it keeps me honest. Fried foods and salty delishiousness is my downfall. Hang in there, toots.
Thanks, I needed that!
I too feel off the health wagon and it is only the second week of January. I have Loseit! on my Iphone and it is a pain but you enter EVERYTHING that passes your lips and I gotta say, it keeps me honest. Fried foods and salty delishiousness is my downfall. Hang in there, toots.
Thanks, I needed that!