It was all Barbara’s fault. I have been toying with buying a harness and leash and taking Shana Punim out for walks. She’s so big and I figured as long as she’s on a harness it’ll work… right? Of course there is the Pandora’s Box issue. Will she crave the air and grass so much that she’ll drive me crazy?
Remember: she was a stray who lived out of doors for God knows how long…
OY! My drunken young twenty something neighbors are screaming off the front porch. GRRRRR. I fear I must move soon.
Anyway, Barbara says to me:
Let her out on your porch. Stormy (her old cat) used to love to go out on the porch and stretch out in the sun.
Of course I pictured Shana Punim jumping off just to annoy me, but Barb said:
She’ll be fine
Anyhoo, I went out on my porch to enjoy the nice weather. Of course Shana acted all uninterested. I noticed that my neighbor’s two dogs and giant tortoise were loose on the porch. That’s when Shana Punim ran out of my apartment onto the porch and bolted into the neighbor’s open porch door, straight into their apartment, way into the apartment, for like fifteen minutes. I resisited the urge to run after her. Suddenly, I had an evil thought:
“this is my chance! Freedom”
I’d be like: Cat? what cat? I don’t hava cat…
I’m just kidding!
So I went back into my own apartment and left the door open just a bit so Shana Punim could come back inside. But instead, Joanna the tortoise creeped into my house. And she’s huge!
EWWW!! I didn’t want to pick her up. She weighs a ton and she had these spikey things that run alongside her legs. So I gently nudged her with my foot (with sneakers on) and of course she immediately retreated into her shell: Legs, head, gone! Poof!! Oh great! It was at this time that my cat comes running into the door (someone must have spooked her in the apartment next door.) However she didn’t spot Joanna untill she was almost upon her and freaked out!
(Imagine the most high pitched shriekish scared) MEOW ever.
She jumped about three feet in the air and fur was just flying off of her!
The dogs start barking frantically. Joanna stays in her shell. Shana Punim is meowing/wailing like crazy.
This goes on for about two minutes.
At this point I reckon Joanna the Tortoise was like: Fuck this shit! because suddenly she thrust her legs and head back out and scurried, yes, I said scurried, away… the dogs calm down and Kitty leaps over Joanna to gallop down the hall to hide. I haven’t seen her since.
There’s never a dull minute around here.
Shana looks like a deer caught in the headlights in that photo!
You shoulda seen her when she spotted Joanna the tortoise in the house!!