Isn’t that what Bette Davis said? I know she was referring to “getting old,” but I have definitely gone through a lifetime of crap as I sift through the debris that makes up my household clutter.

I found a secret stash of extra buttons – in their plastic baggies – from various clothing purchases. It’s so kind of manufacturers to provide extra buttons. Kinda like a little hug. And I actually used my spare buttons – twice. I felt so vindicated!
See! It’s a good thing I have all these buttons!

And then there is my my ATM receipt, magazine and catalog collections!
NOTE: Mind you: this stuff is all in the trash. I do not really collect these things.

But that’s just the beginning. I want to discuss what happened to my cleaning cloth after I wiped off my large television screen. One of my teley’s is an older flat screen HD with a 40 inch screen and a “big ass” as I like to call it, meaning the picture tube extends almost three feet and the whole thing weighs about three hundred pounds and is basically a giant dirt magnet. Plasma TV’s do not do this.
Prior to my cleaning binge, I was usually up at night – all night – watching the teley with no problem. But this day I walked into the room on a sunny day – during the day – and was shocked by the dust on the television. Methinks to myself:
I better wipe that off!

And so I grab my cloth, spray a surface cleaner on it and made a big swipe across the teley screen. This is one clean up I can handle easily!
EWWW!!

My once white cloth had a black handprint on it from that first swipe. It looked as if I had dragged the cloth through tar! It was the freakin’ Shroud of Turin! How the hell did I even see anything through all that dirt??

I won’t even begin to describe the condition of the glass shelves throughout my house. The ones protected by glass doors were white with dust. The open air ones were gray. Oy!

And the kitchen: HA!! Dishes piled up – but not too bad since I live alone. But I have never seen a larger collection of coffee cups in my life!! And there is an abundance of chairs in my kitchen, hordes of small paper tote bags, you know from Starbucks and doggy bags from restaurants and the largest collection of mini condiments known to man.

Anybody need any soy sauce? Hot mustard?

I opened the fridge and dumped out all of the expired half and half cartons and old take-out left overs: so much rice!! and as you know, I have my treasured nail polish collection…

Next I tackled cleaning the work-out equipment! I have been trying to photograph the cobweb that grows between the handles of my airdyne cycle. Do you know how inactive that machine has to be for a cobweb to survive? No one goes by the work-out shit anymore, except for my cat who is thee most curious creature known to man and so when I see the the elusive cobweb and run over – camera in hand – that’s when she decides to creep around and shimmies by the pedals and movement happens and Poof! No more cobweb! I so wanted to share that laugh with you.

I went swimming again for the first time in a year! It felt good to be back in the water and to do some exercise. It really felt good.

So: cleaned the house (not even done with that task but I’m getting close), and I have been watching my food intake and started to get active again.

Oh, the change it is a comin….

Tags: bette davis, house cleaning, lifestyle, Lynne Jordan, lynne jordan & the shivers, lynne jordan and the shivers, working out
Filed under: In the Life of a Diva