The Amazing Adventure’s of Lifestyle Change Girl: You Gotta Be Kiddin’ Me!
Now before I start this rant I want everyone to know that I am neither upset nor injured by the insult that I heard today. I am amused, amazed and a tad bit incredulous.
Okay, here goes: I have been approached by an organization to perform at their annual fundraiser event. We have done this event in the past, usually performing during the cocktail hour, they hire a well known huge super-band for the dinner and dancing portion of the evening, – which is cool as far as I’m concerned because it makes for an early night for us. Well, this year I had a few allies on the committee who pushed for my own uberband: Lynne Jordan & the Shivers to perform during the dinner and dancing part of the night. Usually, I am not party to entertainment committee conversations, I either get a gig or I don’t, but thanks to a very loose tongue I got the scoop- or as in this case – the poop of the committee’s discussion regarding entertainment.
Well, the skinny is: One of the Entertainment committee members had an issue because – are you ready?
“She’s a very large woman, isn’t she?…I don’t know…”
WTF?
So, I have been trying to fill in the blank.
She’s a very large woman, isn’t she? I don’t know_________:
1. If we will have a stage big enough to hold her?
2. If fat entertainers will ruin our charitable image?
3. If she might go on a feeding frenzy and mow down the buffet?
3. if all the skinny assed bitches at the party will be jealous?
4. If she hears about this she might whoop my ass, or worse, sit on me?
I am here standing beside myself! Laughing out loud and scratching my head in amazement.
But then I realized, I have spent almost this entire blog vowing and swearing to stop being large, so why should anyone else be happy with me being large? Wow! Maybe I need to retool the way I express my desire for a body and weight change. I would hate to give credence to this plus-size hater’s attitude!
And that’s all I have to say about that!
And no, contrary to my smart-ass friend Kyle, it wasn’t the “Stop Obesity Now” campaign or the Diabetes Foundation… Kinda reminds me of the time I watched all the smokers discreetly puffing away outside the venue during the American Lung Association’s fundraising gala…
Tags: Lynne Jordan, lynne jordan & the shivers, lynne jordan and the shivers, weight control, weight issues, women's body image
Filed under: In the Life of a Diva
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Well it’s apparent that it’s likely small women such as this perso may also have small minds! From one large woman to another i like all of your suggestions. It’s unfortunate that this woman doesn’t know how LARGE you are Lynne. A LARGE talent, voice, personality, heart, smile, sense of humor, compassionate and force of nature are some of the ways I would describe you Lynne. That broad is judging the wrong book by it’s cover. I’d really like to see her. It’s obvious she hasn’t heard Lynne Jordan and the Shivers. Her loss!! The event would be lucky to have ya.
1 Deb O said this (August 31, 2010 at 7:25 pm)
The upside is they hired us anyway. I didn’t care about what she said. Really, I thought it was funny. I’m just glad that she didn’t add: “and I think she’s a Muslim!”
2 Lynne said this (August 31, 2010 at 7:47 pm)
Mmmm, I would say, she’s larger than life on stage, do we need a better sound system!
That’s just so wrong if it’s anything other than that! Come on, Aretha Franklin is large, so freaking what! grrrrrrrr
3 Adrienne Williams | Web Manager said this (August 31, 2010 at 8:44 pm)
Hmmm…..I figure I can respond in one of two ways: political or tacky.
1) Political would involve foaming at the mouth. I’d say “Don’t get me started”, but too late for that. I’m foaming.
Anyway, I’m just finishing “Infidel”, the autobiography of Ayaan Hirsi Ali. She’s a Somali (former?)Muslim woman who was a refugee elected to the Dutch parliament. Oh man, lots of basis for righteous indignation in there, but I’ll just recommend that EVERYONE read it. She’s an amazing woman with a history that would break us mere mortals. Now, if I can just get my teenage girls to read it…..
2) Tacky. Uber tacky, but apt. Lynne, honey, the woman who was concerned about your size? Is she flat-chested? I’m just asking…..
Yup, I’ll climb down off my soapbox and stick with tacky. So forgive me, but Lynne, that skinny little thang is just jealous. You a fox.
4 Jo said this (August 31, 2010 at 8:49 pm)
I know gurl…
5 Lynne said this (September 1, 2010 at 12:55 am)
Thanks Jo!
P.S. I’ve read “Infidel.” There was a burst of refugee novels out awhile back and I read ‘em all – well most of ‘em. Beautiful stories of struggle and personal triumph. and the amazing thing is most of these folks were not bitter. Love the human spirit!
6 Lynne said this (September 1, 2010 at 12:57 am)
You know what they say, people who are insecure talk smack about others. You are beautiful, confident and have a sensational voice. How dare her wreck shop on your looks. Good thing you got the gig, now knock her dead with your talent.
Really? Pssh, she needs some lessons in tact.
7 rose said this (September 1, 2010 at 10:22 pm)
I have a feeling she got “what for” at some point. I was not bothered really but was mostly amazed! Thanks for compliments dear!!
8 Lynne said this (September 2, 2010 at 12:57 pm)